Funny Jokes for Adults
Santa: Pitaji Mujhe Ek Hajar Ruppe De Dijiye.
Pita: Kyu Kya Karna H Nahi Dunga.
Santa: Mein Dus Manjli Building Se Khud Kar Jaan De Dunga.
Pita: Kudega Kaha Se! Pure Sehar Mein Dus Manjil Imarat Hi Nahi H,
Santa: Mein Paach Manjil Imarat Se Do Baar Khud Jaunga.
~~~~~
Sehar Ke Badhe Post Office Par Ek Aur Yeh Likha Tha
“Jo Bhi Puchna H Kripya Yaha Par Puchiye”
Ek Fauji Yeh Padhkar Waha Gaya,
Aur Waha Jakar Usne Pucha- “Jalebi Kitne Ruppe Kilo H”
~~~~~
Doctor Santa Se: Agar Aap Bhidbhad Se Bachkar Rahoge To,
Aapko Yeh Bimari Nahi Hogi.
Santa: Lekin Doctor Sahab Mein Apnse Peshe Se Majboor Hu.
Doctor: Ku Aisa Kya Pasha H Aapka.
Santa: Darasal Mein Jaibkatra Hu.
~~~~~
Kuwa Khodte Khodte Ek Aadmi Usi Mein Gir Gaya.
“Aur Uska Bahar Nikalna Mushqil Ho Gaya”
Usne Bahut Shor Machaya Lekin Kisi Ne Na Sunne Wala N Tha.
Aur Andhera Ho Chukka Tha Or Thand Bhi Kaafi Badh Gayi Thi.
To Thand Mein Ro Raha Tha Koi Bhagwan Ke Waste Bahar Nikalo.
Waha Se Ek Aadmi Jaa Raha Tha
Usne Dekha Aur Kaha “Thand To Lagegi Hi Bhai!”
Tum Par Mithi Dalne Jo Bhul Gaye H
~~~~~
Ek Kavi Ki Patni Apne Saheli Se Kehti H
Jitney Bhi Badhe Patar-Patrikao Ke Sampadak H,
We Risthe Mein Mere Bhai Lagte H.
Saheli Ne Aascherye Se Pucha Wo Kaise?
Kavi Ki Patni: Asal Mein,
Jab Bhi Inki Koi Rachna Kisi Patar-Patrika Se
Abhiwadan Weh Khed Sahit Wapas Aati H,
To Ye Kehte H- Saale Ne Phir Wapas Kar Di.
40+ Short Funny Jokes for Students
Emergency Ward Mein Marij Dard Se Chilata Hu,
Tabhi Doctor Se Use Operation Karwane Ki Salah Di,
Aur Operation Theatre Ki Table Par Letne Ko Kaha,
Marij Jab Table Par Siddha Leta To Marij Ko Ulta Letne Ko Kaha Gaya,
Doctor Table Ke Niche Ghuskar Pehle Mej Kaat Tha H.
Aur Phir Operation Karke Taanke Laga Deta H,
Iske Baad Marij Ko Siddha Letne Ko Kehta H.
Marij: Doctor Sahab Operation To Successful Ho Gaya,
Lekin Aapko Operation Pet Ka Karna Tha To Mej Ke Niche Ghuskar Kyu Kiya.
Doctor: Tum Nahi Samjhoge , Mein Pehle Motor Mechanic Tha.
~~~~~
Ek Baar Santo Apne 7 Saal Ke Bete Pappu Ke Sath,
Apni Ek Dost Ki Shadi Mein Chali Gayi,
Khana Khane Ke Baad Santo Apni Dost Se Baate Karne Lagi,
Pappu Ne Dekha Ki Jo Koi Khana Khakar Bahar Jaa Raha Tha,
Weh Ladki Ke Pita Ko Kuch N Kuch De Raha Tha,
Kuch Der Baad Santo Ne Pappu Ko 100 Ruppe Dete Hue Kaha
Jao Uncle Ko De Aao.
Pappu Paise Lekar Ladki Ke Pita Ke Pass Pahuca Aur Bola
Lijiye Uncle Ji Humare Bhi Do Thaliyo Ke Paise Kaat Lijiye.
~~~~~
Santa Pehli Baar Truck Chala Raha Tha,
Raste Se Gujarte Waqt Truck Usse Nahi Sambhla,
Or Weh Ek Kothi Ki Chardiwari Ko Todta Hua Gallery Mein Dhakil Ho Gaya,
Aur Samne Ki Deewar Se Takrakr Kothi Ki Bedroom Mein Jakar Ruka,
Waha Malikn Baith Kar Akbar Padh Rahi Thi,
Santa Rote Hue: Mujhe Maaf Kardo Muje To Bangal Jana Tha,
Malkin Boli To Beta Sidhe Drawing Room Mein Jao,
Aur Kitchen Ko Todte Hue Store Mein Se Left Ghum Jana,
Sidhe Bangal Pahuch Jaoge.
~~~~~
Hotel Mein Ek Room Mein Saari Raat Kuch Juwari Taash Kehlte Rahe,
Khoob Shor Kar Rahe The,
Aakhir Tang Aakar Padose Ne Raat Ke 2 Baje,
Deewar Par Mukke Marne Chalu Kar Diye,
Usne Socha Ki Wo Samjh Jayenge Ki Awaaj Band Kar De.
Kuch Der Bhar Baad Hi Unhe Tash Wale Room Se Awaaj Aayi,
Are Bhai Kuch To Socho Bhala Ye Tasveer Tanghne Ka Time H Kya?
~~~~~
Garahk: Aapne Chapwaya Tha Ki Hotel Ka Sara Lekha Jokha
Kisi Aur Ke Hatho Me Chala Gaya H.
Kintu Maalik Ki Gaddi Par To Abhi Aap Hi Baithe Ho?
Malik: Rone Wale Andaaj Mein “Darasal” Maine Shaddi Kar Li H
Best Funny Jokes in Hindi
Raddi Wala Purana Saman Becho, Raddi Becho,
“Behan Ji” Aapke Yaha Nahi H Raddi,
Patni: Sham Ko Aana Abhi Weh Ghar Mein Nahi H.
~~~~~
Ek Aadmi Ne Apni Patni Se Kaha,
Mujhe Door Ka Saaf Nahi Dikta Soctha Hu Chasme Banwa Lu,
Patni: Bekar Paisa Mat Khrabh Karo,
Colony Mein Mujhse Sunder Koi Nahi H.
~~~~~
Biwi Shoping Karke Loti, To Uske Hath Mein Dibba Tha,
Pati Ne Pucha- Kuch Khane Ka Saman Mere Liye Layi Ho Kya?
Jo Aapko Majak Pasand Ho To Jawab Du.
Ha-Ha Ku Nahi.
Khane Ke Naam Par To Mein Nayi Sandale Layi Hu.
~~~~~
Pita: Aaj Ke Paper Mein Tumhe Konsa Sawal Aaya?
Pappu: Weh Kon Si Chij H Jo Tumhe Bilkul Pasand Nahi H
Pita- Phir Tumne Kya Likha?
Pappu: Kuch Nahi, Sirf Answer Sheet Ka Parsan Patar Chipka Diya.
~~~~~
Company Maalik: Tumne Iss Factory Mein Kitne Saal Kaam Kiya H?
Naukar: Pachas Saal, Ji
Maalik: Tumhari Umar Kya H?
Naukar: 30 Saal Hujur
Maalik: Jab Tumhari Umar 30 Saal H To Phir 50 Saal Kaise Kaam Kiya.
Naukar: Jee Overtime Bahut Lagta H Aapke Factory Mein.
~~~~~
Ek Mahila Belan Lekar Apne Pati Ke Piche Bhagi To,
Uske Pati Ne Gajhab Ki Furti Dikhayi,
Aur Daudkar Almari Mein Ghus Gaya,
Patni Belan Se Darwaja Pitthi Hui Bahar Niklo
Pati: Nahi Nikalta
Patni: Mein Kehti Hu Bahar Niklo
Pati: Nahi Niklunga
Patni: Dekho Keh Deti Hu Bahar Nikal Jao Warna
Pati: Nahi Niklunga Nahi Nilkunga.
Aaj Tumhe Pata Lag Hi Jana Chaiye Ki Iss Ghar Mein Kiski Chalti H.
Funny Joke of the Day for Adults
“Bhabi: Mein Bardast Nahi Kar Sakti Ki
Tum Itni Dair Tak Ghar Se Bahar Raho.”
“Lekin Bhabi:” Devar Ne Kaha.
Bhabi Mein Kuch Sunna Nahi Chathi.
Tum Ab Hamesha Clg Se Waqt Par Ghar Aa Jaya Karoge.
“Lekin Bhabi Mein Koi Baccha Nahi Hu”
Bhabi: Esiliye To
~~~~~
Devar: Kal Maine Apni Patni Ko Bahut Pareshan Kiya
Bhabi: Kaise
Devar: Kal Maine Use Ek Nayi Saadi Di
Aur Fir Ghar Ke Saare Seeshe Chupa Diye.
~~~~~
Surgen Ek Safal Operation Ke Baad Ghar Lauta,
To Uski Bhabi Ne Pucha-“Kya Baat H Bahut Kush Najar Aa Rahe Ho?”
“Kushi Ki Baat To Yeh H Jis Marij Ka Maine Operation Kiya H,
We Hiss Sehar Ka Sabse Dhani Aadmi H Aur Main Panch Hazar Ruppe Fees Li H.
Agar Operation Karne Mein Do Ghante Ki Deri Ho Jati To..”
Surgeon Kuch Socthe Hue Rook Gaya.
Bhabi Ne Pucha:”Agar Do Ghante Ki Deri Ho Jati To Kya Ho Jata” Kya Marij Mar Jata?”
Nahi Mar To Nahi Jata Bhabi Lekin Uska Dard Chala Jata.
Devar Ne Muskurate He Kaha.
~~~~~
Bhabi: Kitne Sharm Ki Baat H Ki
Tumne Mujhe 6 Peg Pine Ke Baad Chedna Shuru Kar Diya H”
Devar: Isme Sharm Ki Kya Baat H
Bhabi: Tumne Paanch Peg Sharab Jo Kharab Kar Di.
~~~~~
Char Ladki Ek Alishan Hotel Mein Gayi.
Unme Se Ek Apne Aap Ko Kaafi Hoshiyar Samjhati Thi,
Baaki Sidhi- Sadi Thi,
Sidhi-Saadi Saheliyo Par Rob Jamane Ki Garaj Se,
Chalak Ladki Boli- Pehle Char Plate Menu To Manga
Whatsapp Chutkule in Hindi
Babhi Iss Ladki Ki Aur Sanket Karte Hue: “Tum Iss Ladki Ko Jante Ho?”
Devar: Ha Kabhi Mein Iske Sath Soya Karta Tha.
Babhi: Accha Kab Kaha?
Devar: Jab Mein Clg Mein Padta Tha. History Ke Lecture Mein.
~~~~~
Ek Ladki Ne Apne Devar Jo Film Ke Hero The.
Se Pucha Or Sunaiye Devar Ji Film Kaisi Chal Rahi H.
Devar: Bahut Acchi Chal Rahi H Bhabi Ji.
Pehle Din Koi Bhi Dekhne Nahi Aaya,
Or Dusre Din Bhid Thodi Kam Ho Gayi Thi.
~~~~~
Devar Bhabi Ek Sawal Par Lad Rahe The.
Bhabi: Kon Jyada Santust H….
Jiske Pass Dus Lakh H Ya Jiske Pass Dus Bache H”
Devar: “Jinke Pass 10 Bache H” Kyunki Use Aur Ki Chah Nahi Hoti.
~~~~~
Bhabi: Kya Tum Tair Sakte Ho,?
Devar : Kabhi Kabhi,
Bhabi: Kabhi Kabhi Se Tumhara Kya Matlab H?
Devar: Matlab Ye Ki Jab Mein Pani Mein Hota Hu.
~~~~~
Babhi: Ganga Nadi Kidhar H.
Devar: Jamin Par
Babhi: Haskar Nakshe Mein Kaha H
Devar: Nakshe Mein Kaha Ho Sakti H Naksa To Gal Jayega Na.
~~~~~
Girl Friend: “Tum Jaha Job Ke Liye Gaye The Mili Ya Nahi”
Boy Friend: “Jab Mujhe Boss Ne Salary Ke Bare Mein Pucha To
Maine 30 Thousand” Boss Ne Kaha Tum Abhi
Freshser Ho Phir Bhi Itni Salary Mangte Ho.
Girl Friend: To Tumne Kya Kaha.
Boy Friend: Yahi Ki Jis Kaam Ka Experience Nahi Hota.
Usme Jyada Mehnat Karni Hoti H.
Girl Friend: “Kal Mere Bhai Ne Football Khelkar Purane Saare Record Tod Diye”
Boy Friend: Hmm! Yah Bhi Ajib Khel H.
Football Khelne Mein Kuch N Kuch To Jarur Tootha H.
“Pichli Baar Khelte Waqt Mere Bhai Ne Mera Mooh Toda Tha.”
~~~~~
Ek Gaon Mein Girl Friend Aur Bf Ek Sath Pehli Baar Gaon Se Bahar Nikle.
Inn Dono Ne Rail Bhi Pehli Baar Dekhi Thi.
“Ek Station Par Unhone Biscuit Kharide”
Biscuit Bhi Pehli Baar Dekhe The (Hasna Mana H)
“Boy Friend Biscuit Khane Laga Aur Ek Biscuit Apni Girl Friend Ko De Diya.”
Par Jaise Hi Usne Biscuit Mooh Mein Rakha Gaadi Surang Mein Ghus Gayi,
Aur Dibbe Mein Andera Ho Gaya. “Are Mat Khana”
Mein Khate Hi Andha Ho Gaya Hu.
~~~~~
Mein Tumse Pyar Karta Hu Anjali:
“Mein Tumhare Baigar Jinda Nahi Reh Sakta”
Anjali: “Roti Hui Magar Mere Bhaiya Pyar-Vyar
Bilkul Pasand Nahi Karte”
Ladka: Maine Tumhare Bhai Se Pyar Karne Ko Kab Kaha?”
~~~~~
Boy Friend: Hey Darling.
Dekho Mein Tumhare Liye Tumhare Bday Par
Kitni Acchi Motiyo Ki Mala Laya Hu”
Girl Friend: “Par Maine To Tumhe Car Lane Ko Kaha Tha”
Boy Friend: Darling Nakli Motor Car Mujhe Kaha Milti.
~~~~~
Bus Mein Bahut Bhid Thi Ek Ladka Apne Paas Khadi Hui,
Ladki Ko Baar Baar Kohani Se Ched Raha Tha,
Ladki Aage Nahi Sarak Paa Rahi Thi Bhid Ki Wajah Se,
Or Thodi Bhaut Hoti To Wo Ladka Sath Mein Aage Aa Jata,
Aakhir Mein Tang Aakar Ladki Ladke Ki Aur Jhuki Aur Namarta Se Boli
Bhai Sahab………….
Meri Pasliyo Mein Aapki Kohani Ko Koi Chot To Nahi Pauch Rahi Na.
Hindi ke Majedar Chutkule
Ek Ameer Aadmi Apni Premika Ke Sath White Hotel Me Gaya.
Or Chai Pe. Bill Aane Par Waiter Ko
Bill Ke Sath Sath 100 Rs Tip Bhi Diye.
Or Fir Chair Se Utha Or Waiter Ki
Aankh Par Mukka Maar Kar Uski Aankh Suja Di.
Police Aayi Aur Use Pakadkar Judge Ke Samne Pesh Kiya.
Ameer Aadmi: “Badha Accha Waiter H”.
Ein Kal Waha Phir Khana Khane Jaunga.
Judge: Agar Weh Accha Waiter Tha To Tumne Use Mara Ku.
Ameer Aadmi: “Ab Mein Waha Kal Jaunga To
Mujhe Waiter Dhunde Mein Dikkat Nahi Hogi”
Usne Mujhe Badhi Acchi Service De Thi,
Jo Harjana Aap Kahe Mein Dene Ko Tayyar Hu.
~~~~~
Ek Ladke Or Ladki Mein Behas Ho Rahi Thi,
Ki Bhagwan Ne Aadmi Ko Pehle Aur Aurat Ko Baad Mein Ku Bnaya.
Ladki: Esliye Kyunki Weh Hume Jyada Sundar Bnana Chahta Tha.
Or Esliye Pehle Use Aadmiyo Par Hath Aajmaya.
Ladka: Nahi Wo Kisi Ki Sunna Nahi Chahta Tha,
Aurat Bana Deta To Yeh Bhagwan Ko Pagal Bana Deti.
~~~~~
Kapde Ke Badhe Store Mein Bf-Gf Gaye,
Bf Pent Dekhne Laga Aur Gf Store Mein Aage Chali Gayi
Pareshan Bf In Idhar – Udhar Najar Dali.
Side Mein Khade Manajer Se Pucha,
“Ohh Itni Der Mein Meri Gf Kaha Chali Gayi?”
“Ghabraye Nahi Sahab..”
Humari Store Ki Sabhi Sales Girls Jawan Aur Khobbsurat H.
Aap Kisi Ke Bhi Sath Haskar Baat Kijiye.
Aapki Gf Jaha Bhi Hogi Fauran Aapke Paas Aa Jayegi.
~~~~~
Lamba Safar Se Aate Waqt Premi Jahaj Se Utra Raha Tha,
Ki Plane Ki Sidiyo Par Premika Se Muskurate Hue Kaha.
“Inse Miliye Ye H Miss Anjali, Air Hostess,
Inki Wajah Se Mera Safar Badha Hi Aram Se Kata”
Uske Jaate Hi Premika Ne Jalte Hue Pucha:
“Tumhe Iska Naam Kaise Malum Hua?”
Premi: “Andar Sabhi Ke Naamo Ki Suchi Lagi H”
Premika: “To Dear.. Uss Black Jacket Wale Ka Naam Btana Jara”