Best Funny Jokes In Hindi
Imtihan Ke Hall Mein Sabko Paper Bant Diye Gaye,
Ek Ladka Khada Hokar Likh Raha Tha,
Teacher- Are Tum Khade Hokar Pariksha Kyu De Rahe Ho,
Student- Didi High School Ki Priksha Mein Baithi Thi To,
Fail Ho Gayi Isliye Mein Khade Hokar Pariksha De Raha Hu.
~~~~~
Ek Videsi Aur Ek Bhartiye Ek Hotel Mein Mille,
Videshi Bola: Hamare Desh Mein Ladie Gents Jitna Kaam Karti Hai,
Aur Utna Hi Wetan Pati Hai.
Bhatiye Bola : Yeh Bhi Koi Badi Baat Hai Hamare Desh Mein,
Ladies Kuch Bhi Nahi Karti Hai Parantu Gents Ka Sara Vetan Paa Late Hai.
~~~~~
Ek Aadmi Godha-Gadhi Mein Aaya Aur Andar Chala Gaya,
Iss Beech Mein Ghode Ne Sadak Par Pesab Kar Diya,
Jab Weh Wapas Aaya To Pass Mein Khadi Bachi Boli,
Ab Aapki Gaddi Bahut Door Nahi Ja Sakegi,
Gaddi Wale Ne Pucha – Kyu Kyoki Iska Petrol Nikal Gaya Hai.
~~~~~
Banta Santa Se – To Tumne Apni Patni Ko Taas,
Aur Juaa Khelna Shikhla Hi Diya,
Santa- Haan, Yeh Idea Accha Raha,
Pichle Hafte Mein Usse Apni Tankhawa Ka Ek Tihai Jeet Gaya Tha.
~~~~~
Neta Ji Gaadi Se Ja Rahe The,
Raste Me Unhone Ne Driver Se Kaha,
Ab Tum Hatto Main Gaadi Chlaunga,
Driver Ne Jawab Diya – Shab Yeh Apne Desh Ki,
Sarkar Nahi Hai Jo Ram Bhrose Chalti Rahe, Ye Motor Hai.
40+ Santa Banta Jokes in Hindi
Santa Ne Santo Se Kaha Ki Banta Itna Achha,
Painter Hai Ki Ek Bar Usne Haste Hua Bache Ke Chitar,
Ko Bursh Ke Ishare Se Rote Hua Bache Ke Roop Mein Badal Diya,
Santo – Yeh Koi Badi Baat Nahi,
Aisa To Meri Maa Jhadu Se Hi Kar Diya Karti Thi.
~~~~~
Holi Ka Din Tha, Log Masti Mein Hoi Khel Rahe The,
Ek Police Wale Ne Do Logo Ko Pakadkar Thane Phucha Diya,
Aur Inspector Shab Se Seena Taan Kar Bola,
Hujoor Aaj Mein In Do Mujrimo Ko Range Hatho Pakad Liya,
Ab To Mujhe Head Constable Bana Do,
Pls Or Kuch Nahi Hota Inn Police Walo Kutte Se.
~~~~~
Santo Aur Banto Kuch Waqt Baad Milli To Santo Ne Pucha,
Behan Tue Pappu Ka Ungali Chusna Kaise Chudaya,
Banto – Kuch Khash Nahi Hai Behan,
Uss Ki Nikar Dhili Si Di Hai Wo Use Hi Pakde Rehata Hai.
~~~~~
Mareej – Doctor Sahab Mein Kya-2 Kha Sakta Hu?
Doctor – Roti Bina Chopad Ke, Ghiya Ki Sabji Or Kichadi Bas Yahi Khana Hai,
Mareej Ka Baap – Beta Ye Bhikmango Ka Doctor Maloom Hota Hai,
Bade Aadmiyo Ke Waste Nahi Hai Ye Doctor,
Isko 10 Rupay Dekar Wapas Bhejo Aur Kisi Bade Doctor Ko Bulao.
~~~~~
Chunilal – Yeh Mere Dost Nadeem Ki Kabar Hai,
Iske Pass Jo Bhi Kuch Tha, Wo Sab Usne,
Charitable Trust Ko De Diya Tha,
Suresh – Tumhara Dost Badhe Udhar,
Dil Ka Hai Usne Kya-Kya Diya,
Chunilal- Char Bin Shadi Hui Beti.
Funny Jokes in Hindi For Kids
Ek Purush Jo Shakal Se Kuch Neta Se Bhi Lagte The,
Marble Wale Ki Shop Par Gaye Aur Kaha,
Ki Main Marble Kharidna Chata Hu,
Shopkeeper – Sahab Marble Aap Ko Patrav,
Ke Liye Chaiye Ya Ghar Banwane Ke Liye.
~~~~~
Aazadpur Station Par Ek Mahapurush Jee Utre Aur Ek,
Ghode Gaadi Wale Ko Vandelpur Ke Liye Teh Kiya,
Ghode Gaadi Jab Aage Badi To Unhone,
Raste Mein Ek Gadha Dekai Diya,
Gadha Dekhte Hi Mahapursh Bole : Kya,
Delhi Sehar Mein Bhi Gadhe Rahte Hai,
Ghode Gaadi Wale Ne Kaha – Nahi Hujur,
Kabhi-Kabhi Bahar Se Aa Jate Hai.
~~~~~
Pyarelal Ne Apne Dost Mangeram Ko Khat Likha,
Dost Main Kuwara Hu, Pyaar Kiya To Dard Hi Hath Laga,
Ab Akelapan Iss Tarah Katne Laga Hai Ki Kya Kahu,
Jee Chahta Hai Ki Aatamhatya Kar Lu,
Pyarelal Ne Use Dusre Khat Mein Jawab Diya,
Aatamhatya Karne Ka Sabse Accha Tareeka,
Yahi Hai Ki Tum Jhat Se Shadi Kar Lo.
~~~~~
Baar Mein Santa Bade Gamand Se Bola,
Meri Gharwali Duniya Ki Sabse Khush Aurat Hai,
Banta – Acha, To Tumne Pata Lagane Ki,
Koshish Ki Wo Kis Ke Sath Date Par Hai.
~~~~~
Chintu Ne Apni Ghar Padane Aa Rahi Babli Se Kaha,
Tumhe Mere Ghar Par Rehna Hai To Tumhe Mere,
Puppy Ko Puri Ijjat Deni Hogi, Warna Kal Se Mat Aana,
Babli Ne Pyaar Se Kaha : Aap Bilkul Chinta N,
Kare Mein Use Bhi Aap Jaise Hi Samjha Karungi.
50+ Hindi Chutkule for Whatsapp
Santa Dukandar Se – Bharat Ka Jhanda Dikhao,
Jhanda Dekhane Par Santa Dukandar Se Bola Aur Koi Colour Nahi Hai Kya
~~~~~
Ek Baar Ek Kanjush Sardar Taxi Mein Beth Kar Ja Raha Tha,
Achanak Hi Driver Bola : “Sahab Meri Gaddi Ke,
Break Fail Hogaye Hai”,
Sardar Ek Dam Se Bol Pada – Are Yaar Pahle,
Jaldi Se Taxi Ka Meter Band Kar Do.
~~~~~
Ek Sahab Apne Dost Ko Udhas Dekh Kar Kehne Lage,
Kyu Sahab Aaj Aap Itne Udhas Kyu Hai,
Dost :- Baat Yeh Hai Ki Maine Ek Sahab Ke Sath Milkar,
Vayapar Shuru Kiya Tha Mera Rupya Tha Aur Unka Anubhav.
Dost :- Lagta Hai Aap Dono Ko Ghata Ho Gaya Hai,? Hai Na,
Nahi Ab Unke Paas Rupya Chale Gaye Hai Aur Mere Paas Unka Anubhav Aa Gaya Hai.
~~~~~
Kamar Ke Bal Let Kar Apni Tange Cycle Ki Tarah,
Chlao, Sabhi Aisa Karte Hai Par Ek Ladka Nahi Karta Hai,
Teacher – Chintu Tum Kyu Rukh Hue Ho Kisne Kaha Tumne,
Chintu – Sir Ji Baat Ye H Ki Meri Cycle Dhalan Par Hai.
~~~~~
Manager – Maine Socha Ki Ek Din Thik Time Par,
Office Phuch Kar Sabhi Ko Choka Dunga.
Dost – To Kya Hua, We Shock Hue Ki Nahi.
Manager – Ghanta Waha Koi Phucha Ho Tab Na.
Short Funny Jokes for Students
Santa Ke Papa Ne Usse Mouth-Organ Khareedkar Diya,
Santa Usse Din-Bhar Bajata Rehta Tha,
Tang Aa Kar Papa Ne Use Dukan-Dar Ko Wapis Kar Aane Ko Kaha,
Iss Par Santa Ne Kaha-Aisa Mat Kijiye,
Aaj Se Main Tab Hi Bjaunga Jab Aap So Jayenge.
~~~~~
Do Collage Ke Dost Kafi Arse Baad Mile,
Ek Dost Ne Pucha Yaar Tumhari Shadi Us Ladki Se Ho Gayi Kya,
Nahi Yaar Usne Mujhse Meri Jaydad Ke Baare Mein Pucha,
Maine Bata Diya Ki Mere Peeta Ka Hotel Hai,
Usne Kaha Ki Phir To Mein Tumhare Dad Se Hi Kar Lungi.
~~~~~
Santo- Yadi Tum Pina Bandh Nahi Karoge To Mei Aatamhatya Kar Lungi
Santa- Sach To Mei Vada Karta Hu Peena Bandh Nahi Karunga
~~~~~
Mareej – Doctor Sahab Aapne 2 Hafte Pehle Bulaya Tha,
Taang Ka Plaster Katne Ko, So Lo Main Aa Gaya Hoon.
Doctor – Tumko Mana Kiya Tha Ki Jeena Mat Chadna ,
Mareej – Haan, Doctor Sahab Maine Bilkul Aapke Kehne Ke,
Mutabik Kiya Hai, Jeena Bilkul Nahi Chada, Pipe Ke Raste Chadta Tha.
~~~~~
Pati – Are Bhai Mehmaan Aane Wale Hai Aur Ghar Main Jhadu Tak Nahi Lagi,
Patni – Aapne Hi To Kaha Tha Jab Tak Main Is Ghar,
Mein Hoon Tumhe Kisi Baat Ki Fikar Karne Ki Jarurat Nahi.
~~~~~
Ek Sahab Apne Dost Ko Udash Dekh Kar Kehne Lage,
Kyu Sahab Aaj Aap Itne Udhas Kyu Hai,
Dost – Baat Ye Hai Ki Maine Ek Sahab Ke Sath Milkar Vayapar Shuru Kiya,
Tha Mera Rupya Tha Aur Uska Anubhav,
Phir Kya Hua Aap Dono Ko Ghata Ho Gaya ?,
Nahi Ab Unke Paas Rupya Hai Aur Mere Paas Anubhav.
45+ Non Veg Jokes and Dirty Chutkule
Santa Ke Paas Banta Pehli-Pehli Baar Aaya Aur Unhe Namaskar Kiya,
Phir Bola –Kya Tum Mujhe Paanch Hazar Rupee Udhar Doge ,
Santa- Lekin Mei Tumse Janta Tak Nahi Hoon,
Banta- Aap Mujhe Jante Nahi Hai Isliye Aaya Hu Kyoki,
Jo Mujhe Janta Hai, Wo To Mujhe Ek Rupya Bhi Nahi Dete.
~~~~~
Ek Aadmi Ne Apne Dudhwale Se Chidkar Kaha:
“Tumme Aur Gaye(Cow) Mein Yahi Antar H.
Ki Weh Sudh Dudh Deti H Or Tum Pani Milakar”
Dudhwale Ne Kaha: “Nahi Janab Ek Antar Aur Bhi H”
Aadmi: Kya?
Dudhwale: Mein Udhar Deta Hu Gaye(Cow) Udhar Nahi Deti
~~~~~
Ek Khoobsurat Ladki Ko Uski Company Ke
Ghee Ka Sample Ghar Ghar Batna Tha.
“Kisi Chote Se Rog Se Pidit Hone Ke Karan Doctor Ko Dikhane Gayi”
Doctor Ne Check Karte Waqt Kaha
“Tumhara Swaste To Bahut Accha H. Kya Tum Shadi Shuda Ho?”
Ladki: Jee Nahi Lekin 15 Din Baad Meri Shadi H
Doctor: “Accha Lekin Aajkal Tum Kya Kar Rahi Ho?”
Ladki: Aajkal Mein Free Mein Sample Baat Rahi Hu”
~~~~~
Hosiyar Singh Faujisingh Se- Kya Tum Imaandar Ho,
Fauji Singh- Tum Dekhte Nahi Ki Mein Garib Hi,
Tum Kya Karte Ho?
Mein Ek Dharmik Sanstha Mein Updesak Hu,
Kya Vetan Milta H Tumhe,
1200 Ruppe Har Mahina,
Vetan To Bekar H.
Mein Updesh Konsa Accha Deta Hu.
~~~~~
Judge: “Tumhara Wakil Kaha H?”
Chor: Jee Mera Wakil Nahi H
Judge: Lekin Wakil Hona Jaruri H,
Koi Baat Nahi Hum Tumhare Liye Sarkari Wakil De Denge
Chor: Nahi, Hujur, Mujh Par Reham Kijiye, “Mujhe Koi Wakil Nahi Chaiye”
Judge: “Kyu?”
Chor: “Hujur Baat Yeh H Ki Apni Churayi Murgiyo Ko Mein Akele Hi Khana Chahta Hu”
Best Jokes in Hindi
Pappu Apni Patni Aur 18 Bacho Ke Sath Film Dekhne Nikle,
Choraye Par Khade Police Wale Ne Achanak Pappu Ko Pakad Liya
Aur Thane Lekar Jane Laga,
Pappu Ne Darte Hue Pucha Aakhir Maine Kiya Kya H,
Tum Ne Kuch N Kuch To Kiya Hu Hoga.
Tabhi To Ye Bhid Tumhe Ghere Hui Thi.
~~~~~
Santa- Darling Dekha H.
Sabhi Abhi Netao Ne Do-Do Shadiya Ki H.
Ji Chahta H Mein Bhi
Santo- Ha Kyu Nahi!
Mein Bhi Kahi Dino Se Yahi Soch Rahi Thi,
Ki Mujh Akeli Se To Tum Bachkar Nikal Bhagte Ho.
Fir To Tumhari Aisi Dhulayi Hua Karegi,
Jaisi Ki Supar Rin Se Bhi Nahi Hoti.
~~~~~
Fire Station Ke Telephone Ki Ghanti Baji,
Ek Naujawan Khidki Ke Raste Mere
Bedroom Mein Ghusne Ki Kosish Kar Raha H.
Ek Uttejit Mahila Ka Sawar Sunayi Diya.
Sorry Madam.
Aapne Galti Se Fire Station Par Phone Kar Diya H.
Police Station Par Kijiye.
Mahila: Maine Thik Jagah Phone Kiya H.
Kyunki Use Ek Jyada Lambi Sidhi Chaiye.
~~~~~
Ek Mahila Ne Postmaster Ko Phone Kiya,
Aur Gusse Se Boli- Postmaster Sahad,
Meri Aapse Darkhasat H Ki Aap Humare,
Ilake Ke Postman Par Fauran Koi Karwayi Kijiye, Postmaster: Kyu?
Postmaster Hadbada Ka Bola – Kyu Kya Kiya H Usne?
Meri Kothi Ke Samne Bijli Ke Khambe Par Chada Baitha,
Aur Mere Kutte Ko Halkan Kar Raha H.
~~~~~
Maa Pinki Se- Tumne Dudh Pee Liya
Pinki: Ha
Maa: Phir Iss Tarah Uchalkhud Ku Kar Rahi Ho,
Pinki: Maa Pehle Maine Fika Dudh Piya Aur,
Ab Maine Shakkar Khayi H.
Esliye Mein Ucchal Khud Kar Rahi Hu,
Taaki Thik Dang Se Sab Meetha Ho Jaye.
~~~~~
Ek Baar Monu Ne Hotel Mein Jakar Ek Coffee Mangwayi,
Uska Rate 50 Rs Btaya,
To Monu Ne 10 Chamach Chini Dali Aur Pine Laga,
Waiter: Aapne Chini Ko Gholna To Bhul Hi Gaye,
Monu: Bhula Nahi Hu Sugar H Mujhe.
Mithi Coffee Nahi Pee Sakta.
50+ Chutkule Hindi Me and Comedy Jokes
Santa Ko Scooter Par Ek Kishor Takkar Markar Teji Se Bhag Gaya,
Piche Se Aa Rahe Ek Dusre Scoter Sawar Ne Unhe Uthate,
Hue Kaha- Kaash!…………..
Mein Uss Badmash Ko Pakad Pata.
Santa Jee Karhate Hue Bole – Chodiye Bhi Ab Weh Door Nikar Gaya Hoga.
Scoter Sawar: So To H Par Raat Ko Weh Ghar Aayega
Tab Mein Use Dekh Lunga. Mein Uska Pita Hu.
~~~~~
Santa: Aaj Mujhe 50 Paise Ka Sikka Mila H.
Banta: Wo Mera Tha
Santa: Are Ja Muje To 25-25 Ke Do Sikke Mile H
Banta: Mera Sikka Jamin Par Girkar Tut Gaya Hoga.
~~~~~
Santa Ek Aadmi Se Mila,
Usne Mujh Se 5 Min Baat Ki Or Fir Weh Mujhe Pagal Kehkar Chala Gaya
Banta: Par Sochne Ki Baat To Yeh H Use Itni Der Ku Lagi.
~~~~~
Santa: 5 Ruppe Udhar Dedo.
Banta : Maaaf Karna Mein Aapko Pehchanta Nahi Hu.
Santa: Esliye To Mein Aapse Maang Raha Hu
Kyunki Jo Aadmi Mujhe Janta H Weh Udhar Nahi Deta.
